See the Moon?
IKNOWYOUTHINKImwastingmytime.Youvemadethatperfectlyclear.ButImdugtheseveryimportantlunarhostilitystudies.Anditsnotyouwhollhavetoleavethewarmsafecapsule.Anddipatoeintothethreateninglunarsurround.
Iamstillwearingmyyellohichhaslastedwonderfully.
Mymethodsmayseematouchirregular.Havetodochieflywithfoldedpaperairplapres?ent.Butthepapermustbefoldedintherightway.Lotsofcalculationsandwaboutedges.
ShowmeamanwhoworriesaboutedgesandIllshowyouanatural-bornwinner.CardinalYagrees.bushimselfworried,theAdmiraloftheOSea.Buthekeptitquiet.
Thesunsowarmonthissedporch,itre?mindsmeofmygrandmothersplaTampa.Thesamerustycreakygreengliderandthesamefadedcoloredvascushions.Andatnightthemoongraphedbytheswire,ifyousquint.
TheSeaofTranquillityoccupyingsquares47through108.
Seethemoon?Ithatesus.
Mymethodsarehomelybutrememberonandtheapple.Aherfordstartedouthedidntevenhaveadetlyheatedlaboratory.Aheresthematterofmysecuritycheck--Imwaitingfover.SomebodytolditIminsecure.Thatstrue.
Isufferfrhtfulillnessofthemind,light-mindedness.Itsnotcatg.Youshrink.
Youvenoticedthewall?Ipinthingsonit,souve?nirs.Thereistheredhat,therethebookofin?strusfortheAntFarm.Andthisisatrafficticketwrittenonasaintsday(whichsaint?Idontremember)in1954justoutsideafatlittletown(whichtown?Idontremember)inOhiobyacopwhoaskedmewhatIdid.IsaidIwrotepoppy?cockforthepresidentofauy,truethen.
YouseehowfarIvee.Lunarhostilitystudiesarentforeveryone.
Itsmyhopethatthese...souvenirs...willsomedaymerge,blur--cohereistheword,maybe--intosomethingmeaningful.Agrandword,mean?ingful.WhatdoIlookfor?Aworkofart,Illnotacceptanythingless.YesIknowitsshatteringlyingenuousbutIwaobeapaiheygetawaywithmurderinmyview;Mr.X.oimesagreeswithme.YoudontknowhowIenvythem.TheypickupaBabyRutheroreet,glueittothevas(intherightplace,ofcourse,theresthat),andlo!peoplecrowdaboutandcry,"ArealBabyRuther,byGod,whatcouldberealerthanthat!"Fantasticmetaphysicaladvantage.Youhatethem,ifyouream?bitious.
TheAntFarminstrusareasouvenirofSylvia.TheredhatcamefromCardinalY.Werefriends,inaway.
Iwaobeone,whenIwasyoung,apainter.ButIcouldntstandstretgthevas.Doesthingstothefingernails.Andthatsthefirstplacepeoplelook.
FragmentsaretheonlyformsItrust.
Light-mindedorno,Im...riotouswithmentalhealth.ImeasuremyselfagainsttheRussians,thatsfair.IhavehereaclippingdatelinedMos?cow,fouryoungpeopleappreheranglingaswan.Thatsboredom.Theswansname,Borka.Thesentencesasfollows:Tsarev,metalworker,servedtimepreviouslyforstealingpublicprop?erty,fouryearsinalaborcamp,strictregime.Roslavtsev,electri,jailedpreviouslyfortakingaajoyride,threeyearsandfourmonthsinalaborcamp,semi-strictregime.TatyanaVoblikova(onlyeenandaKomsomolmembertoo),tei,oneandahalfyearsinalaborcamp,degreeofstriessunspecified.AnnaG.Kirushina,teicalworker,fiwentypertofsalaryforoneyear.Annaobjectedtothestrangula?tion,butsoftly:shehelpedstuffthecarcassinabag.
Theclippingistackeduponmywall.Iifromtimetotime,drawingthemoral.Stranglingswansiswrong.
Mybrotherwhoisaverydistinguishedpianist...hasnofingernailsatall.Dontlookitshorrible.Heplaysunderanothername.Andtuneshispianopeculiarly,somecallitsour.Andrendersragashewrotehimself.Anightragaplayedatnooncausedarkness,didyouknowthat?Itsextraordi?nary.
HewaobeanUntouchable,Pauldid.Thatwashisideaofaporarycareer.Butthenagirlwalkedupandtouchedhim(slappedhim,actually;itsaplicatedstory).Andhejoinedus,hereintheimbroglio.
Myfatheroherhandisperfectly?fortable,andthatsnotacriticism.Hemakesflags,banners,bunting(sometimesrunsmeupashirt).Therewasneveraioingmyfatherdrinkfromthepublicwell.HewasontheWellittee,hedecidedwhodippedandwhodidnt.Thatsnotacriticism.Exerciseshiscreativ?ity,nowadays,courtesytheemergingnations.GreenfortheveldtthatnourishesthegracileGrantsgazelle,whiteforthepurityofourrevolutionaryaspirations.Theredforbloodisuood.Thatsnotacriticism.Itswhattheyallaskfor.
Acalltonightfrory,mysonbymyfirstwife.SeventeenandatM.I.T.already.Retlyhesbeenaskiions.Suddenlyhessciousofhimselfasabeingwithahistory.
Thetelephs.Then,withoutagreeting:WhydidIhavetotakethoselittlepills?Whatlittlepills?Littlewhitefillswitha"W"onthem.Oh.Ohyes.Youhadsomekindofanervousdisorder,forawhile.HowoldwasI?Eight.Eightornine.Whatwasit?Wasitepilepsy?GoodGodno,noth?ingsofancy.Weneverfoundoutwhatitwas.Itwentaway.WhatdidIdo?DidIfalldown?Nono.Yourmouthtrembled,thatwasall.Youcouldnttrolit.Oh,O.K.Seeyou.
Thereceiverclicks.
Or:Whatdidmygreat-grandfatherdo?ForalivingImean?Hewasaballplayer,semi-proball?player,forawhile.Theintothebuildingbusiness.Whodheplayfor?AteamcalledtheSt.AugustineRowdies,Ithinkitwas.Neverheardofthem.Well...Didhemakeanymoney?Inthebuildingbusiness?Quiteabit.Didyourfatheriit?No,itwastiedupinalawsuit.Whewasovertherewasntanythi.Oh.Whatwasthelawsuit?Great-grandfatherdiddledamaninalanddeal.Sothestoes.Oh.Whendidhedie?Letssee,1938Ithink.Whatof?Heartattack.Oh.O.K.Seeyou.
Endofversation.
Gregory,youdidntlistentomyadvice.IsaidtrytheVernacularIsles.Wherefisharetwoforapennyandwomentwoforafish.ButyouwantedM.I.T.aron-spin-resonancespectroscopy.Youdidntevencrackasmileinyoursix-plyheatherhopsag.
Gregoryyoingtohaveahalfbrothernow.Youlllikethat,wontyou?Willyouhalflikeit?
Wetalkedaboutthesizeofthebaby,AnnandI.Whatcouldbededucedfromtheoutside.
Isaiditdoesntlotome.Shesaiditsbigenoughforus.Isaidwedontneedsuchagreatrbigoerall.Shesaidtheycosttheearth,thoseextra-largesizes.OurholdingsinJohnsonsBabyPowdertobesideredtoo.Wedneedacresandacres.IsaidwellputitinaSkinnerboxmaybe.Shesaidnochildofhers.Displayedunderglasslikearumproast.Isaidyouhavelately.ShesaidIkeepgettingbiggerwhetherIlaughorcry.
DearAnn.Idontthinkyouvequite...
Whatyoudontuandis,itslikesomebodywalksuptoyouandsays,IhaveabattleshipItuse,wouldyouliketohaveabattleship.Andyousay,yesyes,Iveneverhadabattleship,Ivealwayswantedone.Andhesays,ithasfoursix-teen-insforward,andacatapultforlaungscoutplanes.Andyousay,Ivealwayswaolaunchscoutplanes.Andhesays,itsyours,andthenyouhavethisbattleship.Andthenyouhavetopaintit,becauseitsrusting,a,be?causeitsdirty,andanchoritsomewhere,becausethePoliceDepartmentwantsyoutogetitoffthestreets.Andthecrewisg,andtherearesilverfishinthechartroomandafunnyknognoiseirol,waterrisingintheNo.2hold,andthechaplaintfindthePalestrinatapesfortheSundayservidyoutgetanybodytositwithit.Andfinallyyoudiscoverthatwhatyouhavehereisthisgreat,big,pink-and-bluerockabyebattleship.
Ann.Imgoingtokeepherghostly.Justtheoddbitofdialogue:
"WhatislittleGogdoing."
"Kig."
Idontwantherburstinginonuswiththefresh?nessandinalityofherobservations.Whatweneedhereisperspective.ShesgoodwithGregorythough.Ithinkhehalflikesher.
Dontgo.Thegreased-pigchaseandballoonlaungse.
IromisingoertheElgar,asummacumlaude.Theuyroudofme.ItwasabrightshywhitenewuyontheGulfCoast.Gullsandoleandersandquickhowlinghur?ries.Theteachersbrownburlymenwithpowerboatsandbeers.Thepresideiredad?miralwhoddoifulthingsintheCoralSea.
"Youwillbeacredittous,Gee,"theadmiralsaid.Thatsnotmyname.Improtegmyiden?tity,whatthereisofit.
Applausefromthestandsfilledwithmothersandbrothers.Thenfollowingthemaalonglinebacktothefieldhousetoungowotakemyplaceatthetop.
ButapauseatPusan,araintotheChorwonValley.Walkingdownaroadwearinggreenclothes.Kreenandbladsilent.Thetrucehadbeensigned.Ihadacarbiocarry.MybuddyBoTagliabuethebonusbaby,forwhomtheYankshadpaidthirtythousaewashedrockstoenhanceourarea.elscamecrowdingtofeelBarm.Miestrocks.
IluhThaisfromThailand,hotcurryfralvanizedwashtubs.Engineersbang?ingdowntheroadinsix-by-sixesraisingreddust.MyfriendGibMandellcallingElko,Nevadaonhisvas-coveredfieldtelephone."OperatorIcraveElko,Nevada."
ThenIwasasergeantwithstripes,gettiroopsoutofthesun.Tagliabueasergeanttoo.TristeieneaRoominTokyo,yakkingitupinYokohama.Thenbacktoourlittletenttownonthesideofahill,boostingfifty-gallondrumsofheatingoiltentwardinthesnow.
Ozziethejeepdriverwakihemiddleofthenight."TheygotJulianiangoTank."AndupaastheytaughtusinLeadershipSchool,overthehillstoTango,seventymilesaway.WhizzingthroughTeapot,Tempest,Toreador,withthejeepsvastopflapping.Pfc.Juliandrunkanddisorderlyaenup.TheM.P.sergeantheldoutareceiptbook.Isignedforthebawdyremains.
BackoverthepearlyPacifiagreatvesseldecoratedwithes.Atrailepeelontheplasurface.SittinginthebowfiftymilesoutofSanFrancisco,listeningtotheStatesidediscjockeyschatteringchachacha.Readytograbmyspotatthetop.
Myclotheslookedoldandwrong.Thecitylookedhtallbuildingsraisedwhilemybackwasturned.Irushedhereandtherevisitingfriends.Theywereburniheirbackyards,brownburlymenwithbeers.Thebeefblatheoutside,redontheinside.MyfriendHoracehadfidelity."Listentothatbass.Thatssixtywattsworthofbass,boy."
Ispoketomyfather."Howisbusiness?""IfAlaskamakesit,"hesaid,"IbuyaHasselblad.AndwerekeepinganeyeonHawaii."Theographedmyveteranface,f.6at300.Myfa?theronceacheerleaderatagreatEasternschool.Jumpingintheairandmakingfiergrydown-the-fieldgesturesatthetopofhisleap.
Thatsnotacriticism.Wehavetohavecheer?leaders.
IpresentedmyselfatthePlatOffice.Iwasonfile.Mypertilewasthepertileofchoice."Howeyouwereheadmanofonlyou?dentanization,Gee?"thePlatOfficerasked.Manyhatsfortopfolkwasthefashionthen.IsaidIwasrounded,andshowedhimmyslash.FromtheFengClub.
"Butyouservedyourtryinanoverseaspost."
"Andregardmycareerplalytypedpageswithwidemargins."
"Exemplary,"thePlatOfficersaid."Youseemmarried,mature,malleable,howwouldyouliketoaffiliateyourselfwithushereattheoldschool?Wehaveaspotforapoppyan,towritetheadmiralsspeeches.Haveyoueverdonepoppycock?"
IsaidnobutmaybeIcouldfakeit.
"Excellent,excellent,"thePlatOfficersaid."Iseeyouhavegrasp.AndyousupattheFacultyClub.Andthereisaten-per-tdistonticketsforallhomegames."
Theadmiralshookmyhand."Youwillbeacredittous,Gee,"hesaid.Iwrotepoppycoetimescockypap.Atfouroclockthefacultyhoistedthecocktailflag.WedrankDaiquirisoneachotherssterns.Ihadequippedmyself--afibreglassrunabout,someplacetothink.IadiaoffriendlyshynewuieswewentdownthefieldonGulfCoastafternoonswithgulls,orexcit?ingnightsuhetalltoothpicklights.Thecrowdroared.Sylviarregrew.
TherearticularpointatwhichIstoppedbeingpromising.
MoonstruckIwas,afterafashion.Sittingonabenchbythepracticefield,wherethejockstedsecretsignalsintheirunderwearbehindtallvasblinds.Layaboutbabiesloafingonblas,somestakedoutontwelve-footdogs.Brownmotherssquattiokneeinshiftsofscarletandgreen.Istaredatthemoonspaleday?timepreseseemed...inimical.
Moonstruck.
WereplayingFlinch.Youflinched.
Thesimplestthingsarethemostdifficulttoex?plain,allauthoritiesagree.SayIwastiredofp***yc**k,ifthatpleasesyou.Itstrueenough.
Sylviawentupinapuffofsmoke.Shedidntlikeunsalariedlife.Andcouldntbearamaleac?quaintancemoon-staringinthelightofday.Detpeoplelookatnight.
WehadtroublewithGregory:whowouldgetwhichpart.Shesettledforthree-fifths,andgotIthinktheworstofit,thedreamingraffishRomanypartthatthinksscewillsaveus.Igetmatter-of-factmidnighttelephonecalls:MyE.E.instructorshotmedown.pened?Idontknow,hesanassanyhow.Wellthatmaybebutstill--Whensthebabydue?January,Itoldyou.Yeah,IgotoMexicoCityfortheholidays?Askyourmother,youknowshe--Theresthisguy,hisoldmanhasavilla....Well,wetalkaboutit.Yeah,wasgrandmotheraunist?Nothingsodistin?guished,she--YousaidshewaskickedoutofGer?many.Herfamilywasanti-Nazi.AdlermeanseagleinGerman.Thatstrue.Therewassomethingcalledtheublic,herfather--Ireadaboutit.
WehadtroublewithGregory,wewaobestific.ToysfromProcreativePlaythingsofPrion.ory,thatPriotyouingandgoing.ProcreativePlaythingsatoneendandtheEducatioingServiceattheother.Andthatserious-mindedco-ophatwasamistake."Agrowinguandiweeandchildthroughsharedgroupexperi?ence."IstillrememberpoorHenryHardingIII.Under"Sibs"onthemembershiprolltheylistedhis,byage:
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25
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10
9
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6
OMrs.Harding,haventyouheard?TheyhavetheselittleChristmas-treeorsforthewombnow,theyworkwonders.
Didwedo"badly"byGregory?Willwedo"better"withGog?Suchquestionscurlthehair.Itswisernottoask.
ImentionedCardinalY(theredhat).Hesafriend,inaway.Orrather,thesubjectofoneofmylittleprojects.
Isetouttostudycardinals,aboutwhomsowsnothing.Itseemedtomethatcardinalscouldbeknowninthesamewayweknowfishesorroses,byclassificationandeion.Aper?verseproject,perhaps,butwhoelsehasembracedthispointofview?Diffiowadaystofindapointofviewkinkyenoughtocallonesown,withSadehimselfbeingcarriedthroughthestreetsontheshouldersofsociologists,cheersandshouting,tickertapeunwindingfromhighwindows...
ThewhyofCardinalY.Youreentitledtoanexplanation.
TheCardinalrushedfromtheResidencewavingintheairhishands,glovedinyellowpigskinitappeared,Igraspedahand,"Yes,yellowpigskin!"theCardinalcried.Iwroteinmybook,yellowpigskin.
Signifitdetail.Thepectoralcrosstainsninediamonds,thescarletsoutaneislaunderedrightonthepremises.
IaskedtheCardinalquestions,wehada?versation.
"Iamthinkingofahappyislandmorebeautifulthanbeimagined,"Isaid.
"Iamthinkingofagoldenmountainwhichdoes,"hesaid.
"Uponwhatdoestheworldrest?"Iasked.
"Uponanelephant,"hesaid.
"Uponwhatdoestheelepha?"
"Uponatortoise."
"Uponwhatdoesthetortoiserest?"
"Uponaredlawnmower."
Iwroteinmybook,playful.
"Isthereanyvaluethathasvalue?"Iasked.
"Ifthereisanyvaluethathasvalue,thenitmustlieoutsidethewholesphereofpensandisthecase,forallthathappensandisthecaseisactal,"hesaid.Hewasnotserious.Iwroteinmybook,knowsthedrill.
(OhIhadheardreports,howheslunkaboutinthesnowtellingchildrenhewasSantaClaus,howhedisbursedfundsinunauthorizeddisbursementstounshavenmenwhocametothekitdoor,howhishousekeeperpointedlyrolledhisredsockstogetherandblacksockstogetherhintihredandblackwithblack,theCardinalpatientlyunrollingaredballtogetaredsodablackballtogetablacksock,whichhetheo?gether...)
CardinalY.Hessly.
Iwasthh.IpoppedtheCardinaloellawithalittlehammer,andlookedintohiseyeswithalittlelight.ItestedtheCardinalsstomachacidityusingUniversalIndicatorPaper,ascaleofoen,aspectrumofredtoblue.ThepHvaluewas1indighighacidity.ImeasuredtheCardirengthusingtheMiaMultiphasticMuzzleMap,hehadanM.M.M.M.offouroverthree.IsangtotheCardi?nal,thesongwas"StellabyStarlight,"hedidinanyway.Icalculatedthenumberofgal?loofilltheCardinalsbathtoadepthofteninches(beyondwhichdepth,theCardinalsaid,heneverventured).ItooktheCardinaltotheballet,theballetwas"Theservatory."TheCar?dinalapplaudedatfifty-sevenpoints.Afterward,backstage,theCardinaldahPlenosova,holdiarmslengthwithagoodwillandanillgrace.Theskirtsofthescarletsoutaoodouttorevealhigh-buttonshoes,aagehandsclapped.
IaskedtheCardinalhisviewsonthemoon,hesaidtheyweretheventionalones,andthatishowIknowallIknowaboutcardinals.Notenoughperhapstorearasceofcardinalogyupon,butenoughperhapstoformabasisfortheiiga?tionsofotheriigators.Myreportisoverthere,inthebluebindiomycopyofLaGeomalaNeomanciedesAnsbytheSei?gneurofSalerno.
CardinalY.Onemeasureandmeasureandmissthemostessentialthing.Ilikedhim.Istillgettheoddblessinginthemailnowandthen.
Too,maybeIwastryingontherole.Notformyself.Whenachildisborn,thelocusofoneshopes...shifts,slightly.Notaltogether,notallatoyoufeelit,thisdisplat.Youspeakup,strikeattitudes,likethemotherofatinyLollida.Drunkwithpossibilityoncemore.
Iamstillwearingmyyellohichhaslastedwonderfully.
"WhatisGogdoing."
"Sleeping."
Yousee,Gogofmine,Gogomyheart,Imjusttryingtogiveyoualittlebriefinghere.Idontwantyouunpleasantlysurprised.ItstandastartledlardmeasasortofDistantEarlyWarningSystem.Hereistheworldandherearetheknowledgeableknowersknowing.WhatItellyou?Whathasbeeogetherfromthereportsoftravellers.
FragmentsaretheonlyformsItrust.
Lookatmywall,itsallthere.Thatsaleaf,Gog,stuckupwithScotchTape.Nono,theScotchTapeistheshinytransparentstuff,theleaftheveinedirregularlyshaped...
Thereareseveralsidestothisaxe,Gog,?siderthephotostat,"Mr.W.B.YeatsPresentingMr.GeeMooretotheQueenoftheFairies."Thatsacivilizedgesture,ImeanBeerbohms.AhesculptorAristideMaillolwentintotheprintingbusinesshemadethepaperbychewingthefibershimself.Thatsdedication.AndhereisaPolaroidphoto,showsyourAuntSylviaainganAntFarmtogether.Thatshowclosewewereinthosedays.JustanAntFarmapart.
Seethemoon?Ithatesus.
AndnowesJ.J.Sullivanse-and-blueGulfOiltrucktothrowkeroseothespaceheater.Driveringreensirensuit,redface,blondshavedhead,thefollowingrichverbaltransa:
"Beautifulday."
"Certainlyis."
AndlingbathisgreenglideryofMan.DearAnnwhenIlookatManIdontwantyou.UnfoldedUrsalaThigpenseemseversomuchmoredesirable.Agirltooandwithis,cooking,botany,praphiovels.Someooshowmyslashto.
InanothermonthGogleapsfullyarmedfromthewomb.WhatIdoforhim?IgethimintoA.A.,Ihaveinfluendmakesurenoharshmoonlightfallsonhisnewsofthead.
Hell.Wehopeyoullbeveryhappyhere.松语文学www.16sy.coM免费小说阅读
Iamstillwearingmyyellohichhaslastedwonderfully.
Mymethodsmayseematouchirregular.Havetodochieflywithfoldedpaperairplapres?ent.Butthepapermustbefoldedintherightway.Lotsofcalculationsandwaboutedges.
ShowmeamanwhoworriesaboutedgesandIllshowyouanatural-bornwinner.CardinalYagrees.bushimselfworried,theAdmiraloftheOSea.Buthekeptitquiet.
Thesunsowarmonthissedporch,itre?mindsmeofmygrandmothersplaTampa.Thesamerustycreakygreengliderandthesamefadedcoloredvascushions.Andatnightthemoongraphedbytheswire,ifyousquint.
TheSeaofTranquillityoccupyingsquares47through108.
Seethemoon?Ithatesus.
Mymethodsarehomelybutrememberonandtheapple.Aherfordstartedouthedidntevenhaveadetlyheatedlaboratory.Aheresthematterofmysecuritycheck--Imwaitingfover.SomebodytolditIminsecure.Thatstrue.
Isufferfrhtfulillnessofthemind,light-mindedness.Itsnotcatg.Youshrink.
Youvenoticedthewall?Ipinthingsonit,souve?nirs.Thereistheredhat,therethebookofin?strusfortheAntFarm.Andthisisatrafficticketwrittenonasaintsday(whichsaint?Idontremember)in1954justoutsideafatlittletown(whichtown?Idontremember)inOhiobyacopwhoaskedmewhatIdid.IsaidIwrotepoppy?cockforthepresidentofauy,truethen.
YouseehowfarIvee.Lunarhostilitystudiesarentforeveryone.
Itsmyhopethatthese...souvenirs...willsomedaymerge,blur--cohereistheword,maybe--intosomethingmeaningful.Agrandword,mean?ingful.WhatdoIlookfor?Aworkofart,Illnotacceptanythingless.YesIknowitsshatteringlyingenuousbutIwaobeapaiheygetawaywithmurderinmyview;Mr.X.oimesagreeswithme.YoudontknowhowIenvythem.TheypickupaBabyRutheroreet,glueittothevas(intherightplace,ofcourse,theresthat),andlo!peoplecrowdaboutandcry,"ArealBabyRuther,byGod,whatcouldberealerthanthat!"Fantasticmetaphysicaladvantage.Youhatethem,ifyouream?bitious.
TheAntFarminstrusareasouvenirofSylvia.TheredhatcamefromCardinalY.Werefriends,inaway.
Iwaobeone,whenIwasyoung,apainter.ButIcouldntstandstretgthevas.Doesthingstothefingernails.Andthatsthefirstplacepeoplelook.
FragmentsaretheonlyformsItrust.
Light-mindedorno,Im...riotouswithmentalhealth.ImeasuremyselfagainsttheRussians,thatsfair.IhavehereaclippingdatelinedMos?cow,fouryoungpeopleappreheranglingaswan.Thatsboredom.Theswansname,Borka.Thesentencesasfollows:Tsarev,metalworker,servedtimepreviouslyforstealingpublicprop?erty,fouryearsinalaborcamp,strictregime.Roslavtsev,electri,jailedpreviouslyfortakingaajoyride,threeyearsandfourmonthsinalaborcamp,semi-strictregime.TatyanaVoblikova(onlyeenandaKomsomolmembertoo),tei,oneandahalfyearsinalaborcamp,degreeofstriessunspecified.AnnaG.Kirushina,teicalworker,fiwentypertofsalaryforoneyear.Annaobjectedtothestrangula?tion,butsoftly:shehelpedstuffthecarcassinabag.
Theclippingistackeduponmywall.Iifromtimetotime,drawingthemoral.Stranglingswansiswrong.
Mybrotherwhoisaverydistinguishedpianist...hasnofingernailsatall.Dontlookitshorrible.Heplaysunderanothername.Andtuneshispianopeculiarly,somecallitsour.Andrendersragashewrotehimself.Anightragaplayedatnooncausedarkness,didyouknowthat?Itsextraordi?nary.
HewaobeanUntouchable,Pauldid.Thatwashisideaofaporarycareer.Butthenagirlwalkedupandtouchedhim(slappedhim,actually;itsaplicatedstory).Andhejoinedus,hereintheimbroglio.
Myfatheroherhandisperfectly?fortable,andthatsnotacriticism.Hemakesflags,banners,bunting(sometimesrunsmeupashirt).Therewasneveraioingmyfatherdrinkfromthepublicwell.HewasontheWellittee,hedecidedwhodippedandwhodidnt.Thatsnotacriticism.Exerciseshiscreativ?ity,nowadays,courtesytheemergingnations.GreenfortheveldtthatnourishesthegracileGrantsgazelle,whiteforthepurityofourrevolutionaryaspirations.Theredforbloodisuood.Thatsnotacriticism.Itswhattheyallaskfor.
Acalltonightfrory,mysonbymyfirstwife.SeventeenandatM.I.T.already.Retlyhesbeenaskiions.Suddenlyhessciousofhimselfasabeingwithahistory.
Thetelephs.Then,withoutagreeting:WhydidIhavetotakethoselittlepills?Whatlittlepills?Littlewhitefillswitha"W"onthem.Oh.Ohyes.Youhadsomekindofanervousdisorder,forawhile.HowoldwasI?Eight.Eightornine.Whatwasit?Wasitepilepsy?GoodGodno,noth?ingsofancy.Weneverfoundoutwhatitwas.Itwentaway.WhatdidIdo?DidIfalldown?Nono.Yourmouthtrembled,thatwasall.Youcouldnttrolit.Oh,O.K.Seeyou.
Thereceiverclicks.
Or:Whatdidmygreat-grandfatherdo?ForalivingImean?Hewasaballplayer,semi-proball?player,forawhile.Theintothebuildingbusiness.Whodheplayfor?AteamcalledtheSt.AugustineRowdies,Ithinkitwas.Neverheardofthem.Well...Didhemakeanymoney?Inthebuildingbusiness?Quiteabit.Didyourfatheriit?No,itwastiedupinalawsuit.Whewasovertherewasntanythi.Oh.Whatwasthelawsuit?Great-grandfatherdiddledamaninalanddeal.Sothestoes.Oh.Whendidhedie?Letssee,1938Ithink.Whatof?Heartattack.Oh.O.K.Seeyou.
Endofversation.
Gregory,youdidntlistentomyadvice.IsaidtrytheVernacularIsles.Wherefisharetwoforapennyandwomentwoforafish.ButyouwantedM.I.T.aron-spin-resonancespectroscopy.Youdidntevencrackasmileinyoursix-plyheatherhopsag.
Gregoryyoingtohaveahalfbrothernow.Youlllikethat,wontyou?Willyouhalflikeit?
Wetalkedaboutthesizeofthebaby,AnnandI.Whatcouldbededucedfromtheoutside.
Isaiditdoesntlotome.Shesaiditsbigenoughforus.Isaidwedontneedsuchagreatrbigoerall.Shesaidtheycosttheearth,thoseextra-largesizes.OurholdingsinJohnsonsBabyPowdertobesideredtoo.Wedneedacresandacres.IsaidwellputitinaSkinnerboxmaybe.Shesaidnochildofhers.Displayedunderglasslikearumproast.Isaidyouhavelately.ShesaidIkeepgettingbiggerwhetherIlaughorcry.
DearAnn.Idontthinkyouvequite...
Whatyoudontuandis,itslikesomebodywalksuptoyouandsays,IhaveabattleshipItuse,wouldyouliketohaveabattleship.Andyousay,yesyes,Iveneverhadabattleship,Ivealwayswantedone.Andhesays,ithasfoursix-teen-insforward,andacatapultforlaungscoutplanes.Andyousay,Ivealwayswaolaunchscoutplanes.Andhesays,itsyours,andthenyouhavethisbattleship.Andthenyouhavetopaintit,becauseitsrusting,a,be?causeitsdirty,andanchoritsomewhere,becausethePoliceDepartmentwantsyoutogetitoffthestreets.Andthecrewisg,andtherearesilverfishinthechartroomandafunnyknognoiseirol,waterrisingintheNo.2hold,andthechaplaintfindthePalestrinatapesfortheSundayservidyoutgetanybodytositwithit.Andfinallyyoudiscoverthatwhatyouhavehereisthisgreat,big,pink-and-bluerockabyebattleship.
Ann.Imgoingtokeepherghostly.Justtheoddbitofdialogue:
"WhatislittleGogdoing."
"Kig."
Idontwantherburstinginonuswiththefresh?nessandinalityofherobservations.Whatweneedhereisperspective.ShesgoodwithGregorythough.Ithinkhehalflikesher.
Dontgo.Thegreased-pigchaseandballoonlaungse.
IromisingoertheElgar,asummacumlaude.Theuyroudofme.ItwasabrightshywhitenewuyontheGulfCoast.Gullsandoleandersandquickhowlinghur?ries.Theteachersbrownburlymenwithpowerboatsandbeers.Thepresideiredad?miralwhoddoifulthingsintheCoralSea.
"Youwillbeacredittous,Gee,"theadmiralsaid.Thatsnotmyname.Improtegmyiden?tity,whatthereisofit.
Applausefromthestandsfilledwithmothersandbrothers.Thenfollowingthemaalonglinebacktothefieldhousetoungowotakemyplaceatthetop.
ButapauseatPusan,araintotheChorwonValley.Walkingdownaroadwearinggreenclothes.Kreenandbladsilent.Thetrucehadbeensigned.Ihadacarbiocarry.MybuddyBoTagliabuethebonusbaby,forwhomtheYankshadpaidthirtythousaewashedrockstoenhanceourarea.elscamecrowdingtofeelBarm.Miestrocks.
IluhThaisfromThailand,hotcurryfralvanizedwashtubs.Engineersbang?ingdowntheroadinsix-by-sixesraisingreddust.MyfriendGibMandellcallingElko,Nevadaonhisvas-coveredfieldtelephone."OperatorIcraveElko,Nevada."
ThenIwasasergeantwithstripes,gettiroopsoutofthesun.Tagliabueasergeanttoo.TristeieneaRoominTokyo,yakkingitupinYokohama.Thenbacktoourlittletenttownonthesideofahill,boostingfifty-gallondrumsofheatingoiltentwardinthesnow.
Ozziethejeepdriverwakihemiddleofthenight."TheygotJulianiangoTank."AndupaastheytaughtusinLeadershipSchool,overthehillstoTango,seventymilesaway.WhizzingthroughTeapot,Tempest,Toreador,withthejeepsvastopflapping.Pfc.Juliandrunkanddisorderlyaenup.TheM.P.sergeantheldoutareceiptbook.Isignedforthebawdyremains.
BackoverthepearlyPacifiagreatvesseldecoratedwithes.Atrailepeelontheplasurface.SittinginthebowfiftymilesoutofSanFrancisco,listeningtotheStatesidediscjockeyschatteringchachacha.Readytograbmyspotatthetop.
Myclotheslookedoldandwrong.Thecitylookedhtallbuildingsraisedwhilemybackwasturned.Irushedhereandtherevisitingfriends.Theywereburniheirbackyards,brownburlymenwithbeers.Thebeefblatheoutside,redontheinside.MyfriendHoracehadfidelity."Listentothatbass.Thatssixtywattsworthofbass,boy."
Ispoketomyfather."Howisbusiness?""IfAlaskamakesit,"hesaid,"IbuyaHasselblad.AndwerekeepinganeyeonHawaii."Theographedmyveteranface,f.6at300.Myfa?theronceacheerleaderatagreatEasternschool.Jumpingintheairandmakingfiergrydown-the-fieldgesturesatthetopofhisleap.
Thatsnotacriticism.Wehavetohavecheer?leaders.
IpresentedmyselfatthePlatOffice.Iwasonfile.Mypertilewasthepertileofchoice."Howeyouwereheadmanofonlyou?dentanization,Gee?"thePlatOfficerasked.Manyhatsfortopfolkwasthefashionthen.IsaidIwasrounded,andshowedhimmyslash.FromtheFengClub.
"Butyouservedyourtryinanoverseaspost."
"Andregardmycareerplalytypedpageswithwidemargins."
"Exemplary,"thePlatOfficersaid."Youseemmarried,mature,malleable,howwouldyouliketoaffiliateyourselfwithushereattheoldschool?Wehaveaspotforapoppyan,towritetheadmiralsspeeches.Haveyoueverdonepoppycock?"
IsaidnobutmaybeIcouldfakeit.
"Excellent,excellent,"thePlatOfficersaid."Iseeyouhavegrasp.AndyousupattheFacultyClub.Andthereisaten-per-tdistonticketsforallhomegames."
Theadmiralshookmyhand."Youwillbeacredittous,Gee,"hesaid.Iwrotepoppycoetimescockypap.Atfouroclockthefacultyhoistedthecocktailflag.WedrankDaiquirisoneachotherssterns.Ihadequippedmyself--afibreglassrunabout,someplacetothink.IadiaoffriendlyshynewuieswewentdownthefieldonGulfCoastafternoonswithgulls,orexcit?ingnightsuhetalltoothpicklights.Thecrowdroared.Sylviarregrew.
TherearticularpointatwhichIstoppedbeingpromising.
MoonstruckIwas,afterafashion.Sittingonabenchbythepracticefield,wherethejockstedsecretsignalsintheirunderwearbehindtallvasblinds.Layaboutbabiesloafingonblas,somestakedoutontwelve-footdogs.Brownmotherssquattiokneeinshiftsofscarletandgreen.Istaredatthemoonspaleday?timepreseseemed...inimical.
Moonstruck.
WereplayingFlinch.Youflinched.
Thesimplestthingsarethemostdifficulttoex?plain,allauthoritiesagree.SayIwastiredofp***yc**k,ifthatpleasesyou.Itstrueenough.
Sylviawentupinapuffofsmoke.Shedidntlikeunsalariedlife.Andcouldntbearamaleac?quaintancemoon-staringinthelightofday.Detpeoplelookatnight.
WehadtroublewithGregory:whowouldgetwhichpart.Shesettledforthree-fifths,andgotIthinktheworstofit,thedreamingraffishRomanypartthatthinksscewillsaveus.Igetmatter-of-factmidnighttelephonecalls:MyE.E.instructorshotmedown.pened?Idontknow,hesanassanyhow.Wellthatmaybebutstill--Whensthebabydue?January,Itoldyou.Yeah,IgotoMexicoCityfortheholidays?Askyourmother,youknowshe--Theresthisguy,hisoldmanhasavilla....Well,wetalkaboutit.Yeah,wasgrandmotheraunist?Nothingsodistin?guished,she--YousaidshewaskickedoutofGer?many.Herfamilywasanti-Nazi.AdlermeanseagleinGerman.Thatstrue.Therewassomethingcalledtheublic,herfather--Ireadaboutit.
WehadtroublewithGregory,wewaobestific.ToysfromProcreativePlaythingsofPrion.ory,thatPriotyouingandgoing.ProcreativePlaythingsatoneendandtheEducatioingServiceattheother.Andthatserious-mindedco-ophatwasamistake."Agrowinguandiweeandchildthroughsharedgroupexperi?ence."IstillrememberpoorHenryHardingIII.Under"Sibs"onthemembershiprolltheylistedhis,byage:
26
25
23
20
19
15
10
9
8
6
OMrs.Harding,haventyouheard?TheyhavetheselittleChristmas-treeorsforthewombnow,theyworkwonders.
Didwedo"badly"byGregory?Willwedo"better"withGog?Suchquestionscurlthehair.Itswisernottoask.
ImentionedCardinalY(theredhat).Hesafriend,inaway.Orrather,thesubjectofoneofmylittleprojects.
Isetouttostudycardinals,aboutwhomsowsnothing.Itseemedtomethatcardinalscouldbeknowninthesamewayweknowfishesorroses,byclassificationandeion.Aper?verseproject,perhaps,butwhoelsehasembracedthispointofview?Diffiowadaystofindapointofviewkinkyenoughtocallonesown,withSadehimselfbeingcarriedthroughthestreetsontheshouldersofsociologists,cheersandshouting,tickertapeunwindingfromhighwindows...
ThewhyofCardinalY.Youreentitledtoanexplanation.
TheCardinalrushedfromtheResidencewavingintheairhishands,glovedinyellowpigskinitappeared,Igraspedahand,"Yes,yellowpigskin!"theCardinalcried.Iwroteinmybook,yellowpigskin.
Signifitdetail.Thepectoralcrosstainsninediamonds,thescarletsoutaneislaunderedrightonthepremises.
IaskedtheCardinalquestions,wehada?versation.
"Iamthinkingofahappyislandmorebeautifulthanbeimagined,"Isaid.
"Iamthinkingofagoldenmountainwhichdoes,"hesaid.
"Uponwhatdoestheworldrest?"Iasked.
"Uponanelephant,"hesaid.
"Uponwhatdoestheelepha?"
"Uponatortoise."
"Uponwhatdoesthetortoiserest?"
"Uponaredlawnmower."
Iwroteinmybook,playful.
"Isthereanyvaluethathasvalue?"Iasked.
"Ifthereisanyvaluethathasvalue,thenitmustlieoutsidethewholesphereofpensandisthecase,forallthathappensandisthecaseisactal,"hesaid.Hewasnotserious.Iwroteinmybook,knowsthedrill.
(OhIhadheardreports,howheslunkaboutinthesnowtellingchildrenhewasSantaClaus,howhedisbursedfundsinunauthorizeddisbursementstounshavenmenwhocametothekitdoor,howhishousekeeperpointedlyrolledhisredsockstogetherandblacksockstogetherhintihredandblackwithblack,theCardinalpatientlyunrollingaredballtogetaredsodablackballtogetablacksock,whichhetheo?gether...)
CardinalY.Hessly.
Iwasthh.IpoppedtheCardinaloellawithalittlehammer,andlookedintohiseyeswithalittlelight.ItestedtheCardinalsstomachacidityusingUniversalIndicatorPaper,ascaleofoen,aspectrumofredtoblue.ThepHvaluewas1indighighacidity.ImeasuredtheCardirengthusingtheMiaMultiphasticMuzzleMap,hehadanM.M.M.M.offouroverthree.IsangtotheCardi?nal,thesongwas"StellabyStarlight,"hedidinanyway.Icalculatedthenumberofgal?loofilltheCardinalsbathtoadepthofteninches(beyondwhichdepth,theCardinalsaid,heneverventured).ItooktheCardinaltotheballet,theballetwas"Theservatory."TheCar?dinalapplaudedatfifty-sevenpoints.Afterward,backstage,theCardinaldahPlenosova,holdiarmslengthwithagoodwillandanillgrace.Theskirtsofthescarletsoutaoodouttorevealhigh-buttonshoes,aagehandsclapped.
IaskedtheCardinalhisviewsonthemoon,hesaidtheyweretheventionalones,andthatishowIknowallIknowaboutcardinals.Notenoughperhapstorearasceofcardinalogyupon,butenoughperhapstoformabasisfortheiiga?tionsofotheriigators.Myreportisoverthere,inthebluebindiomycopyofLaGeomalaNeomanciedesAnsbytheSei?gneurofSalerno.
CardinalY.Onemeasureandmeasureandmissthemostessentialthing.Ilikedhim.Istillgettheoddblessinginthemailnowandthen.
Too,maybeIwastryingontherole.Notformyself.Whenachildisborn,thelocusofoneshopes...shifts,slightly.Notaltogether,notallatoyoufeelit,thisdisplat.Youspeakup,strikeattitudes,likethemotherofatinyLollida.Drunkwithpossibilityoncemore.
Iamstillwearingmyyellohichhaslastedwonderfully.
"WhatisGogdoing."
"Sleeping."
Yousee,Gogofmine,Gogomyheart,Imjusttryingtogiveyoualittlebriefinghere.Idontwantyouunpleasantlysurprised.ItstandastartledlardmeasasortofDistantEarlyWarningSystem.Hereistheworldandherearetheknowledgeableknowersknowing.WhatItellyou?Whathasbeeogetherfromthereportsoftravellers.
FragmentsaretheonlyformsItrust.
Lookatmywall,itsallthere.Thatsaleaf,Gog,stuckupwithScotchTape.Nono,theScotchTapeistheshinytransparentstuff,theleaftheveinedirregularlyshaped...
Thereareseveralsidestothisaxe,Gog,?siderthephotostat,"Mr.W.B.YeatsPresentingMr.GeeMooretotheQueenoftheFairies."Thatsacivilizedgesture,ImeanBeerbohms.AhesculptorAristideMaillolwentintotheprintingbusinesshemadethepaperbychewingthefibershimself.Thatsdedication.AndhereisaPolaroidphoto,showsyourAuntSylviaainganAntFarmtogether.Thatshowclosewewereinthosedays.JustanAntFarmapart.
Seethemoon?Ithatesus.
AndnowesJ.J.Sullivanse-and-blueGulfOiltrucktothrowkeroseothespaceheater.Driveringreensirensuit,redface,blondshavedhead,thefollowingrichverbaltransa:
"Beautifulday."
"Certainlyis."
AndlingbathisgreenglideryofMan.DearAnnwhenIlookatManIdontwantyou.UnfoldedUrsalaThigpenseemseversomuchmoredesirable.Agirltooandwithis,cooking,botany,praphiovels.Someooshowmyslashto.
InanothermonthGogleapsfullyarmedfromthewomb.WhatIdoforhim?IgethimintoA.A.,Ihaveinfluendmakesurenoharshmoonlightfallsonhisnewsofthead.
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并不代表本站立场!本站亦无法严格审:Unspeakable Practices, Unnatural Acts最新章节其版权归属。如您对Unspeakable Practices, Unnatural ActsTXT下载持有版权方面的异议，请联系本站客服。我们将于72小时内处理。
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